This Could Be the Best Homemade Video Since Charlie Bit My Finger…*

(* – no promises made)

What does one get a family member who has everything? More to the point, what does one get a family member when one has no money, no time and has a terrible habit of writing in the ‘one’ tense? That’s right, she makes a truly amazing video featuring Phil Collins (obviously).

It seemed such a good idea to make a video for lil bub Bennett’s birthday, but then in truth I think I may have really just wanted to pay tribute to Phil Collins and feed my middle age condition (the one where people are born liking The Archers and consider staying up to watch the BBC News at 10 to be a ‘crazy’ one. Yeah, that one.) Anyway, I thought the video would be a nice thing to do for her.

20 hours later…

Brain dead, caffeine overdosed and fed up of seeing my sister’s face more than my own, I finally created a masterpiece. “She better love this” I thought, before dashing into Lush the next day to buy a back up present. Safe thing too, when I first presented her with the gift she seemed less than amused at the offering.

“Right. Ok, well that’s a very nice memory stick Ali, thank you.”

“No you donut, it’s what’s on the stick.”

“Oh right!”

“Did you seriously think I’d give you a cheap USB stick for your birthday?”

*Silence*

“Just play the video.”

Luckily, she loved it. And now, for your viewing pleasure, I have added that same video here. Enjoy! (Well as much as you can given you know nothing of my family and it’s in-jokes…if nothing else watch it for Phil.)

 

 

Written in response to the WordPress prompt Dancing

Happy 100th Birthday, Sorry, Blog Post to Me

When I found myself sat in the non descript office of a finance advisor, sipping on tepid water and discussing my death it did cross my mind that I’d had more upbeat birthdays. The situation was made all the more bleaker when he asked me how I planned to spend the rest of my day. With a Christmas brass band playing outside the window, I said half-humouredly “oh, you don’t understand, this meeting IS the highlight of my day”. He laughed out loud, I cried a little inside.

Actually, tell a lie, birthday festivities began on Thursday when I was talking to a nice man on the HSBC care line (long story). He told me it was his birthday on the 5th as well, with the ensuing three minutes being probably the most excitable conversation over a mundane topic which ever existed. (Our shared birthday with Walt Disney gave us fodder for a good minute.) Sadder still, if he called me up tomorrow I’d happily have the same conversation all over again.

When did I get to the point when any of this constituted as a birthday? When did I get so desperate that I start roping random men into my celebrations? More to the point though, when did I get so mature? I mean ruddy heck, I’m (soon to be) only 24 years old. Maybe I should save my generation the bother and switch the digitals round, become 42. I think I could quickly adapt to a middle aged pace of life, after all I am partial to hummus and will happily tune into Desert Island Discs. Give it six months and I’ll be shopping in Edinburgh Woollen Mill for shortbread.

Saying that, this is how birthdays make me feel:

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Maybe I spoke too soon.

So it’s happy birthday to me and happy 100th blog post. It’s one of the few 2016 New Year Resolutions I’ve been able to achieve this years but one I’m pretty chuffed with (making it to 100 blog posts that is, not the whole 24 thing. We’re not in Victorian England anymore).

Now let’s all hold hands and join in wishing me a wonderful birthday. Happy birthday to me (tomorrow), happy birthday to me (tomorrow), happy birthday to Walt Disneyyyy, happy birthday to me (tomorrow).

Oh yeah, and also happy 100th blog post to me. So that’s happy 100th blog post, Disney, man from the HSBC care line, and personal birthday to us, happy 100th blog post…