Author: My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett)

Graphic Novel Review: “Fetishes” by Lyone 3D

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Book, Book Review, Humour, Review ,

Rating: 2 stars

Headline: A hefty dose of Fetish-on-Fetish action, with illustrations that needed a lot more refinement

Review:

Fetishes by Lyone 3D is the first in a series of speculative graphic novels set a world where humanoids (or “fetishes”) have been created for the protection and entertainment of humans. A highly sort after commodity, the fetishes have become the valuable playthings of the rich and famous, with ownership limited to only the elite classes within society.

After a dancing contest featuring five attractive male fetishes, the nameless woman comes away having secured what the crowd have voted for as the most desirable. Renaming the fetish to Reiver, the female owner pushes her fetish’s programming to the absolute limits, accumulating in her enlisting Reiver into a fight organised by the wives of other fetishes. For over seven pages there is pure fetish on fetish action. Reiver ultimately fends off all his rivals and is taken back home by its owner, making no attempt to hide her disinterest in her fiancée as she takes Reiver, the fetish, to bed. While the fiancée may not outwardly seem to care about the well-being of his partner’s fetish, the look exchanged between him and Reiver suggests there could be more than meets the eye to this heterosexual slave robot/human owner relationship.

The biggest critic I have with this graphic novel is in the quality of the drawings. Imagery makes up 95% of what the story is trying to portray, yet time and time again the poor quality of the character faces becomes a major distraction. When the characters grin they portray a deathly haunting look, on the occasions where characters look direct at the reader (as is the case in the first scene involving pundits talking to camera), in these scenarios the profile views are more than disturbing. The proportions are all wrong.

I can see what the author/artist is trying to do with this story and with refinement it could potentially work. I would question some of the plot developments (some elements feel very rushed through), but given this is the first in a series the story arch could possibly get through with a three-star rating. The drawing standard however, that is something much harder to overlook and ultimately brings this review down to the two-stars that it is.

AEB Reviews

Links:

Reedsy Discovery Review: AEB Reviews – “Fetishes” by Lyone 3D

Purchase Link:

**

Could you spare a dollar to support me doing what I love? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**

Sunny days in Falmouth (Cornwall)

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Humour , , , ,

Just back after a week in the beautiful West Country town of Falmouth (Cornwall, UK).

Amazingly for Britain, we got (close to) a full week of blue skies and wall to wall sunshine* (*one day was a bit overcast, but we’ll overlook that for the sake of argument). I even got sunburnt! This was then followed by several days of jackets and cardigans to prevent me turning into a literal tomato.

Much gin, cyder and Cornish pasties were consumed and it was wonderful.

It just goes to show, when British holidays pull through, they really pull through.

**

Could you spare a dollar to support me? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**

Book Review: “My Prosthetic Life” by Laura Kendall

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Book, Book Review, Humour, Review , , ,

Rating: 4 stars

Headline: A triumphant memoir celebrating the determination to succeed

Review:

The initial cursorily that drew me to Laura Kendall’s memoir My Prosthetic Life came admittedly at a level of crude intrigue, subconsciously seeking answers to the questions any able-bodied person would have in response to anyone who has grown up with of a prosthetic limb. “Do you resent the drugs companies who prescribed thalidomide to pregnant mothers?”, “what is it like to navigate airport security?”, “how do different prosthetic limbs compare, how do they operate day-to-day?” But as I dug deeper into this memoir I realised this title is so much more than that.

There is more to Kendall’s humanistic storytelling than cold metal and plastic, more to her than the clinical definition of her condition (phocomelia of the left arm). In this memoir there is instead a real sense of warmth and inclusion, with an approach to writing that is open, honest and candid in nature. She shares images of a joyful youth, coupled with the struggles of growing up in a highly conservative household and parental abandonment from the choices made in later life. Tales of love and laughter in lavish surroundings sit next to a deeply troubled scene of a failed attempt to commit suicide (prevented by the intervention of her husband). It really is a roller-coaster of emotions, transporting the reader on a journey that absorbs every element of Kendall’s life. You come away appreciating the challenges Kendall has overcome, with the hint of modesty that acknowledges there are things that could have done differently (a theme particularly present in her references to drug addiction and her role as a mother).

Some of the earlier chapters are pone to causing confusion, where Kendall’s chapter structuring moves readers a bit too briskly from recent experiences to childhood upbringing (and then back again). There is also a heavier focus on particular life stages versus others (personally I felt more could have been said on Kendall’s teenage years and the High School system). That said, this is an insightful read and nothing less than a case study on how, regardless of outward appearances, we are unified by the challenges we face.

AEB Reviews

Links:

Reedsy Discovery Review: AEB Reviews – “My Prosthetic Life” by Laura Kendall

Purchase Link: “My Prosthetic Life” by Laura Kendall (Amazon)

Author Website: https://www.laurakendallwriter.com/

**

Could you spare a dollar to support me doing what I love? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**

Rachel Parris: Throw yourself into the life you have and “bee kind”

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Humour

I curse under my breath as I fumble my housekeys with sweaty fingertips, hair bun tumbling out in long strands. Despite best attempts to get away from work at 5, it’s now gone 6pm and I’m running hideously late. The sun beats down on my exposed neck as I barge my way into the house, laptop case bearing down on my slight wrist like a sack of cement.

I’m clambering up the stairs using what remaining hands and feet I have at my disposal. The primeval movement releases that niggling comment lodged at the back of my skull. “Alice, running late?” it says, “what’s new there?” I throw my laptop across my bedroom floor, coat myself in enough body spray to suffocate the voice and tumble back down the two flights of stairs. I charge out the front door, remembering to pull out the key as an afterthought.

I barely notice the bee. Fat and furry, dragging its belly across the hot tarmac and far too reoccupied to notice the broad foot-shaped shadow hovering above. I look at my watch, glance around, look at my watch again. It’s doubtful anyone will else will come to the aid of a sickly bee, especially on a territorial housing estate where Swindon’s answer to The Bridge is two neighbours fighting over who clears up the ceremonial cat deposits positioned between two adjoining houses.

I rub a hand across the back of my sweaty neck and sigh. From inside the footwell of my car, I retrieve a notebook and rip out a lined sheet. It’s a rip that causes several more pages to scatter, prized scraps of disjointed creative thought now dotted in as many places. I lunge to grab one, dart over to save another before it is run over by a car. I narrow my eyes at the bee, biting my bottom lip which now tastes more of salt than it does of lipstick.

I eventually get the bee onto a neighbouring hedge. I don’t know how, I just do. Chucking the now ailing orange notebook across the backseat of my car, I turn on the ignition. The engine is still warm, the news station no further along in its ankle deep coverage of the upcoming local elections. I’m rolling off my drive and heading out the estate.

And then the bee flies into my windscreen.

It’s unbelievable, pure head-first, comedy gold. Of all the places and directions, the first bee of the season has decided to fly into the windscreen of a bright blue Fiat 500. There are no words to describe it, which is probably why I burst into laughter. “Alice, trying to save a bee with a death wish? What’s new there?”

It’s this very bee that fills my thoughts as I’m listening to the comedian Rachel Parris discuss the pieces of audience advice, words that make the backbone of her publication debut, Advice from Strangers. “I don’t mean to be rude,” she says, “but if there’s one bit of advice that I really don’t like it’s #BeKind.” She makes an overstated hashtag sign with her fingers and the audience laughs. “It’s meaning seems to have gotten lost on social media and now everyone uses it in a really patronising way. In that sense guess you could say I ‘have beef with Be Kind.'”

Funny, I think, I seem to have beef with just a single bee.

Rachel lists of her favourite pieces of advice, ranging from “never pass up the opportunity for a wee” to the more cryptic, such as “don’t sleep with either of them” and “don’t go into the attic when drunk”. Taking these as a springboard, Parris uses the pieces of advice in her book to reflect and challenge wider debates in society, whilst also commenting on her experiences with miscarriage and becoming a mother. When asked by the audience for her own piece of advice to strangers Parris thinks, long and hard, before answering. “Throw yourself into the life which you have.”

Her presentation now hitting its stride, Parris takes multiple questions from the audience, firing responses back with the same sharp wit that helped shape her career. On recalling her experiences with the BBC, Parris recounts, “the producers were surprisingly open to some of the ideas we pitched. I don’t think any of us ever thought we’d get away with putting up a sign on screen that read ‘Boris Johnson is a liar and a racist’ and yet they did.” She laughs. “Yeah, that one was a bit of a victory.”

Parris’ authorship career in books might be in its infancy but it is clear it also has so much potential (should she even wish to continue with it – her aspiration of penning a Jane Austen musical will remain tough competition to any future works in progress). Feminist, comedian, presenter, mother and now author, with this many strings to her bow it’ll be fascinating to see where Rachel Parris goes next.

With a final round of applause the lights are brought up and people begin shuffling out of the stands. As I make my way out to the Swindon Arts Centre my thoughts turn to the bee on my driveway. For all the frustration it caused me, I still hope it was able to get over the shock of hitting my car and fly to safety. “Maybe I’ll plant something in my garden,” I think, “in case he comes back.”

As I’m driving home I develop my own piece of advice, one for me and me alone. No matter what life throws at you (or your car windscreen), bee kind.

Image credit: The Scotsman

Advice from Strangers is available to buy from any number of places where book things are sold

Previous Swindon Literary Event write ups from AEB:

**

Could you spare a dollar to support me? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**

Book Review: “Buckhead Road and Other Horror Shorts” by Adam Nestor

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) #book, Book, Book Review, Humour, Review , ,

Rating: 3 Stars

Headline: These four short stories are sure to send a chill down your spine, even if the tone of voice is a bit repetitive

Review:

Buckhead Road and Other Horror Shorts is a collection of four short stories by the author Adam B. Nestor. Full of suspense and gore, they sit within the horror genre and not for the faint hearted.

“Skin”, the first and my favourite of the four short stories, plays on the idea of illusion when Corey discovers one day a mysterious lump growing on his abdomen that seemingly no one else can see.

“Jack-‘O’-Lantern” utilises the well-trodden backdrop of Halloween to set the scene. The arrival of a mysterious group of men at Jessica’s fancy-dress party set off a chain reaction of events. As the situation worsens and the bodies pile up, Erika is drawn into violent consequences of which there can be no victors.

“Buckhead Road” follows the story of Hanna and Jeremy Barnes, a newly married couple move out of the city to a house on the ominously named street Buckhead Road, where the locals are just as spooky as the goings on within the neighbourhood itself.

“Stephen’s Cabin” is written in the style of increasingly disturbed diary extracts. Penned by a former occupant, the journal details the diarist’s decent into insanity as an isolated figure in “Uncle Stephen’s” cabin with only a stray dog for company and a dwindling supply of food.

These short stories are good to a point, the stories are separate and the use of description and metaphors were well-placed for bringing the horror and gore to life. Where the writing does falter however is in some of the basics; all four stories are written in first person narrative and while this alone would not be a reason to discredit the writing, across the board there is limited distinction in the tone of voice. It feels like each tale is being recounted by the same protagonist, an image fuelled by the constant (and excessive) use of expletive language. I am no prude, but on more than one occasion it feels like the use of the ‘F’ word is deployed as a lazy get-around to express character emotion in place of better writing. The grammatical and spelling errors are also distracting, it is a disappointment that Nestor failed to employ the services of an experienced proof reader to remove some of the glaring mistakes.

This book is the perfect company to anyone who enjoys horror, just maybe not those who are horrified by grammatical mistakes and swear words.

AEB Reviews

Links:

Reedsy Discovery Review: Buckhead Road and Other Horror Shorts (AEB Reviews) 

Purchase Link: Buckhead Road and Other Horror Shorts (Amazon)

**

Could you spare a dollar or two? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**

Book Review: “House Moving Therapy” by Mila Petrova

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Book, Book Review, Humour, Review , , ,

Rating: 3 stars

Headline: A book which tries to boil the ocean in its style with somewhat tepid results

Review:

House Moving Therapy by Mila Petrova is, if nothing else, a creative homage to one determined author’s relentless determinism and resilience toward frequent property moves. Using her personal experiences, Petrova brings to market a guide which aims to support readers going through relocations, be it through the author’s empathetic words or in the medium of tough love, providing instruction on how to get through the ordeal as swiftly as possible. Throughout, Petrova’s advice is considerate, factoring in the impact property moves can have on one’s mental health and wallet.

The structure of this book is straightforward enough, five chronological sections with multiple chapters listed underneath, coupled summary boxes as conclusions to most of the key chapters. At nearing four hundred pages long, there is certainly a lot to digest here in terms of content. This is probably the book’s major stumbling block, one which limits its potential audience. While in places Petrova bestows some valuable tokens of advice (e.g., how to decide what items to keep versus what to throw away, how to ship items to a new address without breaking the bank), these insights are bogged down in far too much surrounding copy that could have been cut out altogether. Long paragraphs have a tendency to veer somewhat off topic, switching from numbered bullets to detailed descriptions of Petrova’s past life, in a way that feel more akin to memoir than self-help. At points it feels like the author has lost focus on the book’s intended purpose.

Personally, I think this book would have benefited from being split in two; one book covering the practical ‘how to’ of moving house and a second publication that was more reflective in outlook, focusing on the author’s personal experiences. This follow-on title would been beneficial memoir in its own right. Petrova’s writing is of a respectable calibre to produce both stand-alone books, instead of one chunky title.

House Moving Therapy tries to boil the ocean by tackling distinct two genres in one book and in this case, the writing just isn’t quite up to par to pull it off.

AEB Reviews

Links:

Reedsy Discovery Review: AEB Reviews – “House Moving Therapy”

Purchase Link: “House Moving Therapy” by Mila Petrova (Amazon)

**

Could you spare a dollar to support me doing what I love? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**

Unboxing April’s “Books That Matter” / “Aphra” Subscription Box

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Humour , , , , ,

In February I reviewed my first “Books That Matter” subscription box (you can check out the video here).

Here is my unboxing video for April’s edition. Enjoy! (Hopefully without a burnt tongue and Kate Bush hair.)

Products featured in my Books That Matter subscription box

Book: The Human Origins of Beatrice Porter and Other Essential Ghosts by Soraya Palmer

Treat: Boom & Blossom hand cream

Treat: Beam snack bar

Treat: Ohh Deer stationery

Additional treats: Astrea zine (produced by Books That Matter) and bookmark

See also:

Reviewing the “Books That Matter” Subscription Box (February)

**

Could you spare a dollar to support me? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**

What strikes you about this picture?

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Humour

As spotted in a local antiques shop.

Swiss scrap book

If you saw something a little bit naughty, then you too have the exact same mindset of someone who is far too easily amused.

That’s right, for all of two seconds you had a mindset like me. Congratulations.

(Bonus points if you also giggled.)

**

Could you spare a dollar to support me? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**

Book Review: “The A to Z Series” (self-help guides by Noah William Smith)

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Book, Book Review, Humour, Review , , ,

Rating: 3 stars

Headline: A neat collection of snappy titles that place added emphasis on emotional well-being

Review:

I’ll level with you, I’m a busy person.

I have a regular 9-5 job, a tonne of other commitments outside of that, and I need to survive. As much as I’d love to read a 500 page guide on how to transform my life, if it ain’t sugar coated and nutritionally balanced, then that bar of chocolate is probably going to take priority.

Noah William Smith’s “A to Z Series” of books are anything but lengthy. While the entire series is comprised of ten books, today I am reviewing four of the collection, each about twenty sides of A4 in length, cover-to-cover.

  • Book one, How to Motivate Yourself in 15 Minutes is the punchiest of the guides, with added emphasis on quick motivational wins. It also happens to be my favourite title of the collection.
  • Book five, How to Become Emotionally Smarter has a slightly more phycological leaning, focusing on emotional intelligence and the need to consider the implications of one’s own actions on those around them. Guidance here touches on themes including respect and consideration of others.
  • Book six, Want to Replenish Your Spirit? Looks at ways to boost internal confidence and get the positive endorphins going on a tight budget. Suggestions for mood-boosting activities include smiling more and watching films with that spark feelings of joy.
  • Book eight, Enhance Your Internal Motivation Now takes a wider lens view on self-betterment, asking readers to consider their surroundings and draw on external factors to boost internal motivation.

All four guides are to the point, quick to absorb and quick to implement with a welcomed use of the author’s personal experience to add colour to the recommendations presented. As the series progresses there are some noticeable repetitions in the tips and guidance (felt most acutely in book eight, Enhance Your Internal Motivation Now, although this in part is due to its positioning as a latter book in the collection). What I would have loved to have seen inserted into these books is a wider input from the author’s local community, the methods employed by his friends, family and colleagues to insert positivity into their day-to-day lives. A visual cue or two to give a flavour of the real South Africa, from where Smith is based.

Smith’s “A to Z Series” forms a neat little collection of titles. While some could be refined and condensed it does not take away from the pleasant experience I had reading them as separate titles.

AEB Reviews

Links:

Purchase Link: Noah William Smith (Amazon author page)

Follow Link: Noah William Smith (Amazon)

Why aren’t more people complaining about this Tesco advert?!

My Housemate's a Mermaid (Alice E. Bennett) Humour , ,

If there is one thing I cannot stand it’s museum mannequins. You need only look at my experiences at The Eden Project in Cornwall and Crumlin Road Gaol in Belfast to get a flavour of how it plays out on a day-to-day basis.

Not well.

My reasoning is thus:

  • a) Poorly executed waxworks bear no resemblance to what a human actually looks like.
  • b) They don’t need dumping in random locations. For example, it is natural to assume a historic prison would have housed people. The inclusion of mannequins with black eyes and broken jaws? Not needed!

That in mind, I would strongly argue that Tesco’s newest advertising release successfully hits both points 1 and 2. In other words, it’s downright disturbing.

I’m telling you now, if this had been aired when I was four years old I would have been crying all night.

And, for the first time, it seems I am not alone in my “ahh! Get it off my screen!”

Not only does my boyfriend also agree it’s weird (which, given he’s dating me, shows how high the bar is set) but also, according to this article by Decision Marketing, the Advertising Standards Authority (ASA) has already received 58 complaints over this advert.

So what the heck, Tesco?!

Here’s hoping this advert is swiftly dropped. My sleep pattern depends on it.

**

Could you spare a dollar or two? Donate here!

Alice’s Funding Page

**