Rating: 2 Stars
Headline: Too much in too few words: this short story is wounded by its lack of descriptive text
Review:
Matthew Howard’s story Following the Boar: An Ancient Historical Fiction Short Read (hereafter Following the Boar) is a short read and to the point. It tells the story of Borvo, a Scottish warrior, who must prepare for battle against a strange and fearsome enemy who has been massacring the local population and invading lands. As the clan travels toward the battlefield, Borvo and his father rally additional comrades to join the fight, including warriors who swear allegiance to his uncle, Breenus. Together the combined forces travel on in a climatic battle with the enemy of steal.
The main problem I have with this short story is in the quantity of content. In Following the Boar, the author, Howard, has attempted to pack in far too many events into too a short space of time, at the detriment of the descriptive text. Reading through this story I get no sense of place and I struggle to follow the movements of the characters. It is impossible for me to visualise the appearance (and number) of warriors coming from the different fractions; so much focus is made on the three central characters I kept forgetting they were there until suddenly they appear on the battlefield. The protagonist Borvo has no development; even in short stories the reader needs strands of insight to help flesh out the image of the main characters, their personality, drivers and beliefs. Sadly there is none of that here.
One example – the story starts with Borvo waking up on the floor. Why is the protagonist sleeping on the floor? His father is the chieftain of the clan, he even asks his son about his “first taste of poverty”, so what was the cause to place Borvo in humble surroundings?
Without the essential sprinklings of insight and description, it is hard to comprehend why characters make the choices they do and the reader is left feeling disengaged with what limited action takes place. When the ending occurs, somewhat abruptly, it leaves for only feelings of dissatisfaction, as opposed to clamouring for more.
Howard should take this short story as a pause for reflection. The existing story arch would make a good basis for a historic novel or, with elements removed, could be refined into a succinct short story. Improvement needed, but within the muddy battlefield there are glimmers of potential.
AEB Reviews
Links
Reedsy Discovery Review: AEB Reviews – Follow the Boar: An Ancient Historical Fiction Short Read
Purchase Link: Following the Boar: An Ancient Historical Fiction Short Read (Amazon)
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